Relaxing with mixed emotions

The trip to Nanaimo is over. It was a wonderful time. This is a pic of me and Krista together at last. It has been years since we have been together and I can say that I have missed her more than words can say. I have never had a sister, but she is definitely as close to one as I will ever get. We are alike in so many ways, and to be with her was like remembering parts of myself that were lost.

I finally got to meet the boys and Hillary. Oh my sweet Hillary...I wish I could hold you in my arms every day.

Kale is so funny. He is the most articulate boy and so polite. I just could not stop smiling and laughing at him. He is such a breath of fresh air. Just a wonderful person to be around.

Sammy...hmmm what can I say about him. Once you look into his eyes and he smiles at you, that is it your done. I was wrapped around his finger from first look. He is so wonderful.

Aden.....I still miss you! I never got to spend any time getting to know you again. Maybe next time.

We spent time at Rathtrever and it was an absolutely gorgeous day. Krista and I took lots of photos. I think between the both of us we must have taken 300 in total. It was worth it. Time flew. Everyday was like a blur...I am sad that I never had more time. I miss the island, the smell of the ocean, the ocean itself, the memories, etc...which brings me to the mixed emotion part. I would love to start packing right now and move, but we have so many commitments here. Shane has the business, well we both do really. Stasia has her friends. We have our house and really this is were we have mad a life together. On the other hand, we could just sell it all and be off. Start a new journey start a new business. I would have what I have missed for years and get to watch not only my daughter grow, but Krista's kids too. I would love to be a bigger part of their life. To be able to just pop over when I wanted. Again....sadness and happiness mixed all together.

Home is hot. It rained the whole time on the island, that is something I don't miss. It is 119 degrees right now at home. That is a big difference from rain.

We went to Playland on our way home. Five and a half hours of spinning and jerking around on rides. Fabulous absolutely wonder full. Stasias cousin Courtney joined us. I am glad. I have missed her too. There was a period of years that I missed out on her life as well, but now I am so happy that she is back in our lives. Anyway it went well, until both Courtney and myself felt like we had to puke. I could not take anymore rides. We were suppose to stay at my brothers house that night, but I really wanted to come home. I missed my hunny (shhh don't tell) and I really wanted to sleep in my own bed. It was comfy. I went right to sleep, oh after I said hi to my dogie for an hour, then I went to sleep and never woke until my hunny got me up to have a coffee with him at 7:30 this morning. It is good to be home. Oh and the house was actually clean!!!haha. So it is now around 1:00 and I have just finished showering and having coffee. I think I am going to go check the mail and relax until tomorrow. Time to go to work.

Bye for now!

Getting older

So yesterday, I thought why don't I take my daughter to the movies. That would be fun, right?
Well I learned that I am now to old and not to cool anymore. She went to the movies with me and hung out with me for a total of 2 mins. Yes just enough time for me to pay and hand her cash for the concession. She caught up with her friends there and I proceeded to my seat. She brought me a med popcorn and a small pop and left with my change and me sitting in my seat alone! Gosh when did I get old? And why did I have to? I tell you what sitting there by myself waiting for the movie to start was kinda saddening. I have had her to myself all these years and now empty handed I am. Oh well, I suppose that is the way the cookie crumbles.
Oh...the movie. We (in separate seats) seen The Fantastic 4 Rise of the Silver Surfer. My rating on a scale of one to ten is a seven. The first one was better. Anyway, bye for now.

Been a long time.

Time seems to go by so quickly. It seems like I haven't been on here for a long time. So...where to start. Well a lot has been happening. Stasia got her braces taken off, and she looks even more beautiful than before ( which is amazing because she was already gorgeous). Ummm what else. We have renovated parts of our house. The bathroom is finally getting put back together. The living room is no longer mint green (thank goodness). We are finally going to organize some of this computer wiring in the kitchen so it does not look like a technical disaster. That is a good start.
Stasia and I have been training this July. It has been mostly for kumite. I tell ya what...I suck right now! Who would think something like fighting would be that hard, well it seems to be. I learned I have no coordination. Yep two left feet or is it right feet? All the same right now. I am going to have to really apply myself before next fall so maybe I will catch on to some techniques and not get my ass kicked. Anyway, I think I still have a case of writers block. So until next time...take care.

Enjoying a sunny day.

Today we went to Vaseaux Lake. I went kayaking, as you can see, and Shane and his friend went fishing. They had no luck with fish, but Shane did catch a Lilly pad, poor guy it's better then nothing though.

Staisa is camping with her grandparents this weekend, so we haven't done much. Watch a movie, had a BBQ burger, and today the lake. We were there for about three hours, so I imagine my arms will be sore tomorrow. Oh well, it's not going to hurt me...right? When we got home I cut the front lawn and weeded the front flower bed, which was long overdue for a weeding. It looks so much better. I can actually see my hostas. I planted five of them last year, but only four came back. Which is fine, because the four that did come back are bigger and very nice to look at, so I don't miss number five. Anyway, I am going to go and get some more sun so enjoy the rest of your weekend. Happy July 1st everyone and enjoy the fire works.

Grade Seven

Well, that's it for another year. We now have a grade seven student living amongst us.
Congratulations Stasia on a job well done.
The most exciting thing for her is now she gets to wear make-up!

All Curfuffled!

Well, I have to say my friend has the most beautiful baby girl I have ever seen (next to my own daughter, that is). She is exquisite.
Actually it has thrown me for a loop. I am so emotional thinking back at my own time of having a baby and can not believe that I will never have another. Holding a precious gift of life.
My daughter has been and always will be the most wonderful gift I have ever received, but it hurts my heart to think it stops with her. There are so many things to think about though and for the majority I have talked myself out of thinking that I would be able to accommodate mother hood to anymore children. My biggest fear was breaking the bond with my daughter. You see, Stasia and I have travelled a long road together. She has always been my drive for life. Now though she is twelve and I know that is not all grown up and she still needs me and all that, but she just doesn't need me enough...you know? Which is good and I love the stages of watching her grow and soon she will be a teen and I can't wait to see her become a young teen girl, flirting and giggling and laughing and fussing all the good things. I just miss the baby times. She was a perfect baby. Never cried never grumpy she was a happy little bundle of joy.
Even if it was possible to have a child I would be older and right now I have started on a journey for myself. It's true you know..as you become and older woman (well, closer to the forties years) You really do become more complete and satisfied in your own self. I really love the time I am spending at karate, and kayaking( if I ever get out again) and times I get to just do nothing. But would I give it up again to hold and adore another gift of life? I don't know. What I do know is looking at Krista's baby and seeing pictures of her boys makes me think, yes I might. Time, luck, and patients, all contributing factors. Well, I suppose though maybe it will pass and I will just get over it, but it seems to always be burning in the back of my brain. What if? Is this really the end? Do I wait now until my daughter is grown and decides that she is ready to have children. What if she never does and I have become accustomed to the fact that I was going to be a grandma one day and settled for never having more because of that, and she decides she does not want them. Of course that would be fine, it's her life, but what if? This is just a post of rambling I really needed to get it out you know. This way it is still to myself and I don't have to talk to anyone about it, but of coarse you all are reading this so I also feel like I talked to someone, even though I didn't. So Rambling is done and the next post will be happy and I will be over the indecisiveness. No regrets Roght? Right. So good day to all and Thanks again. Krista...you have done a marvelous job...Hillary is wonderful. Enjoy!

Funny!

Funny Dog! I was playing with my new camera again, just to see what it can do. You know, different settings and what not. I put it on the fast shutter setting and got my dogie burning up some turf and this shot was one of many action shots of her. I posted this one, because I find it hilarious. Every time I look at it I lol.

Anyway, the rest of my weekend has been nice. Stasia is at Karate camp, working her butt off I am sure haha. So I had lots of time to myself and to spend it with my hunny. I started fixing up this corner of my back yard into a bird area. I love birds they are so funny to watch. Oh...I will have to take a pic of my little area for all to see, because it looks neat. It's like a bird community all little houses and feeders..its so cute. Ok anyway, I did that and my hunny put up his weather station ( Finally!) Its pretty neat. It has all the functions like wind pressure air pressure and temperature, blah blah it's pretty high tech for a home one. We ate take out ALL weekend (Stasia is going to be mad) So I did not have to cook. Oh but I did clean the house so I did some work that was not so fun. We watched movies, I even got Shane to watch a move that does not have to give warnings of language and violence etc before it starts. We watched Night at the museum. I liked it. I even think he did. Now today it Sunday and I am obviously sitting at the comp right now, but I am enjoying drinking coffee. Yummy there's nothing like a cup of java in the morning to get me started. Actually if I don't drink it I am a bear in the morning! Really.

I have to pick Stasia up at 2:30pm today (she will be exhausted) so I have a few more hours before I have to leave at 12:00pm to relax and take in more alone time ahhh. Such a wonderful thing. When you never have alone time it sure makes you appreciate it. Anyway have a great day to all.

Oh and one more thing Hillary hurry up and yourself into this world would you!